So here's another one!
An addition to my previous blog post: Robin Thicke is also an awful person for his behavior at the VMAs for allowing the simulated sex to occur. Also he thinks he's being cheeky and has successfully skirted the outrage I feel at his music video, but he's OH SO WRONG. It's not satire, honey. You're just using that excuse to weasel out of the wave of rage that should rightfully crash down around your sexist head. I am not fooled by you or anyone associated with you. And it doesn't matter that you got permission from your wife and the models filming with you. The message you broadcasted was one of objectification. You treated those women like stage pieces, pretty scenery. Congratulations on giving that advice to those who look up to you. Now hundreds of women will feel the joy of being treated like a tool used exclusively for the pleasure of their partners. You should be so proud.
I have so much more to say on that subject, believe me. But I've curbed myself, because my full rant mode is not pretty for anyone.
In other news, I am cooking dinner for the Marine and his brother tomorrow. I think this new friendship is growing nicely. We might go swimming after, too. It depends on what the little man wants to do. I feel that this has the potential to go so much further, but I don't want to do anything prematurely. Also I made the first move last time and he didn't express interest, so I think it's best if I just drop it and concentrate on the friendship. Sometimes I forget for just a minute when I feel the tension between us and I know if I make a move it will probably be reciprocated. Then reality slaps me upside my fool head and I remember that I'm not supposed to be thinking like that.
It's hard to remember sometimes. I'm also not telling our mutual friends that we're hanging out. I'm not trying to keep it from them, but it hasn't really come up. I also don't really want them to play a part in my friendship with the Marine. Last time that happened everything fell apart at the seams. So I'm not planning on saying anything unless they ask me about it. That's not bad, right?
Well, I'm going to bed. Have to get my beauty sleep so I don't look like a hot mess tomorrow.
Ta, loves!
Thursday, August 29, 2013
Tuesday, August 27, 2013
Wow, I'm So Lame
I haven't updated in, like, forever.
I've been in this black pit of despair because I cannot find a job and school started today for everyone down here in my hometown. It's the first time I've not been in school when school starts, and I'm going a little batshit, to be honest. How did this happen? When did I become an adult with adult responsibilities and shit? Super lame.
Anyway, that's been on my mind all day. I went to lunch with my brothers and one of my good friends, and on the way there I realized that I've grown up. Years ago, my brother Dylan got me into watching award shows. We'd watch them and then talk about them for DAYS after. Literally. But we didn't watch the VMAs last night. In fact, we all played Clue for two hours and went to bed before midnight. So when we woke up this morning and got online to do our normal morning things (I check my email, Facebook, and Tumblr, while Dylan reads the news) we noticed some talk about what happened at the award show last night.
I mean, really? When did this society devolve into oversized children too caught up in the spectacle before them to realize that people have feelings and that they should cary themselves better when being filmed and watched by millions who idolize them. I know it has to be hard for the "elite" few, who have had their lives ripped open and examined from every angle. They've been speculated about, mocked mercilessly, and sometimes socially crucified because they refuse to give everything of themselves to us, greedy as we are. So I get it. It's not something that one ever gets used to, I imagine. But having said that, there has to be some responsibility on their part. They realize they're idolized by the younger generations who have made them successful. That idolization comes with a hefty responsibility. So please, have some respect for yourself and for those around you. Please refrain from booing people and the success they've worked hard for just because you don't like them. Please don't disrespect the people in the same boat as you. You know how it feels to be in their shoes. And PLEASE respect yourself enough to know that there is a difference between expressing your independence and degrading yourself to prove that you can do what you want.
Anyway...
That was also on my mind.
So the more important news in that the Marine and I finally hung out! Without everyone else too! I mean, he brought his younger brother with him, so we weren't alone. But still.
Also, he is super protective of his younger brother, I think because he is so much older than him. I was told that the best way to impress the Marine is to get in good with his brother. So I was naturally FREAKING OUT when he told me he was bringing his brother to come hang out. It felt like a really big test, and I didn't want to fail it miserably.
My brother Roosevelt (Roo) told me that I couldn't make a big deal out of it. Friends first, especially since the last time I tried anything he shut me down and then we didn't talk for most of the summer. So instead of getting all snazzy and dolling myself up, I kept it simple. Didn't put on excessive make-up, and just braided my hair to keep it out of my face.
When they got to my house, we settled in and started to watch movies. The younger brother was a little hesitant to relax, given that I was a total stranger. I was also at a loss. I wanted to make a good impression, but didn't know how to. We loosened up, and eventually I forgot I was supposed to try to impress them and started to have fun.
You all know how much I like the Marine. He's a great guy, and I really want him to stay in my life. But his little brother is probably cooler than him. I forgot what it was like to talk to someone in Elementary school, and he was SO CUTE HOLY CRAP. I loved him. Apparently he liked me too, because all of a sudden he wanted me to meet his cousins and his sister and I had to go to this place with them or go do that thing sometime because he thought I'd like it. The feeling I got when he'd turn to the Marine and suggest that we all do something or I meet some family member is pretty indescribable.
After they left I felt awesome. We finally got past all the crap from the beginning of the summer, and I made a new friend. Granted, he's in 5th grade, but he's still a seriously cool kid. I can't wait for us to hang out again.
I haven't told any of my friends that we all hung out. I don't think they need to know, and the less involved they are with my relationship with the Marine, the better off I'll be.
Well, I'm fucking tired. I'm going to go to bed, lovelies.
Goodnight!
I've been in this black pit of despair because I cannot find a job and school started today for everyone down here in my hometown. It's the first time I've not been in school when school starts, and I'm going a little batshit, to be honest. How did this happen? When did I become an adult with adult responsibilities and shit? Super lame.
Anyway, that's been on my mind all day. I went to lunch with my brothers and one of my good friends, and on the way there I realized that I've grown up. Years ago, my brother Dylan got me into watching award shows. We'd watch them and then talk about them for DAYS after. Literally. But we didn't watch the VMAs last night. In fact, we all played Clue for two hours and went to bed before midnight. So when we woke up this morning and got online to do our normal morning things (I check my email, Facebook, and Tumblr, while Dylan reads the news) we noticed some talk about what happened at the award show last night.
I mean, really? When did this society devolve into oversized children too caught up in the spectacle before them to realize that people have feelings and that they should cary themselves better when being filmed and watched by millions who idolize them. I know it has to be hard for the "elite" few, who have had their lives ripped open and examined from every angle. They've been speculated about, mocked mercilessly, and sometimes socially crucified because they refuse to give everything of themselves to us, greedy as we are. So I get it. It's not something that one ever gets used to, I imagine. But having said that, there has to be some responsibility on their part. They realize they're idolized by the younger generations who have made them successful. That idolization comes with a hefty responsibility. So please, have some respect for yourself and for those around you. Please refrain from booing people and the success they've worked hard for just because you don't like them. Please don't disrespect the people in the same boat as you. You know how it feels to be in their shoes. And PLEASE respect yourself enough to know that there is a difference between expressing your independence and degrading yourself to prove that you can do what you want.
Anyway...
That was also on my mind.
So the more important news in that the Marine and I finally hung out! Without everyone else too! I mean, he brought his younger brother with him, so we weren't alone. But still.
Also, he is super protective of his younger brother, I think because he is so much older than him. I was told that the best way to impress the Marine is to get in good with his brother. So I was naturally FREAKING OUT when he told me he was bringing his brother to come hang out. It felt like a really big test, and I didn't want to fail it miserably.
My brother Roosevelt (Roo) told me that I couldn't make a big deal out of it. Friends first, especially since the last time I tried anything he shut me down and then we didn't talk for most of the summer. So instead of getting all snazzy and dolling myself up, I kept it simple. Didn't put on excessive make-up, and just braided my hair to keep it out of my face.
When they got to my house, we settled in and started to watch movies. The younger brother was a little hesitant to relax, given that I was a total stranger. I was also at a loss. I wanted to make a good impression, but didn't know how to. We loosened up, and eventually I forgot I was supposed to try to impress them and started to have fun.
You all know how much I like the Marine. He's a great guy, and I really want him to stay in my life. But his little brother is probably cooler than him. I forgot what it was like to talk to someone in Elementary school, and he was SO CUTE HOLY CRAP. I loved him. Apparently he liked me too, because all of a sudden he wanted me to meet his cousins and his sister and I had to go to this place with them or go do that thing sometime because he thought I'd like it. The feeling I got when he'd turn to the Marine and suggest that we all do something or I meet some family member is pretty indescribable.
After they left I felt awesome. We finally got past all the crap from the beginning of the summer, and I made a new friend. Granted, he's in 5th grade, but he's still a seriously cool kid. I can't wait for us to hang out again.
I haven't told any of my friends that we all hung out. I don't think they need to know, and the less involved they are with my relationship with the Marine, the better off I'll be.
Well, I'm fucking tired. I'm going to go to bed, lovelies.
Goodnight!
Tuesday, August 6, 2013
The Funny Thing About Today Is
I feel just as bad as I did yesterday. It hurt yesterday that I wasn't invited, and it hurts today because I know at least one of them lied to me about it. I gave her an opportunity to come clean and she didn't.
I dont even think they meant to exclude me...again. It's hard for me to think that they would be that malicious. They just don't care enough to remember me.
The awful thing about trying to be the bigger person when your feelings have been hurt is that you still feel bad, no matter what you do. I could have caused a scene, but at the end of the day I would still feel bad, and they wouldn't want to talk to me. Choosing to take the high road also hurt, because I was the only person who felt bad. They didn't have a reason to be upset because they were all at the beach, having a blast I imagine. Knowing that they were having fun without me just made it hurt more.
So I was nice, and I bottled it all up. I spent the day with one of my brothers, and came home to a television and a season of Modern Family. It was all fine until I got on Facebook and saw the pictures they took. Now my repressed feelings have come out of their bottle and are keeping me awake.
I have to go to bed because I have a certification exam tomorrow, so I'm off to count sheep until I pass out.
Ta, loves!
I dont even think they meant to exclude me...again. It's hard for me to think that they would be that malicious. They just don't care enough to remember me.
The awful thing about trying to be the bigger person when your feelings have been hurt is that you still feel bad, no matter what you do. I could have caused a scene, but at the end of the day I would still feel bad, and they wouldn't want to talk to me. Choosing to take the high road also hurt, because I was the only person who felt bad. They didn't have a reason to be upset because they were all at the beach, having a blast I imagine. Knowing that they were having fun without me just made it hurt more.
So I was nice, and I bottled it all up. I spent the day with one of my brothers, and came home to a television and a season of Modern Family. It was all fine until I got on Facebook and saw the pictures they took. Now my repressed feelings have come out of their bottle and are keeping me awake.
I have to go to bed because I have a certification exam tomorrow, so I'm off to count sheep until I pass out.
Ta, loves!
Monday, August 5, 2013
It's Been A While
But fear not, lovelies! I am back once again to rant about my poor social life. This time it's because I was disinvited from a plan a bunch of my "friends" and I have had for a while.
We were all going to go to the beach sometime this summer, right? Well those plans have finally been put into action. Just...without me. Found out on Facebook. A few minutes ago, actually.
I guess I'm not all that fun to be around? Or according to them I'm not. I thought we were all friends. I thought we were all going to hang out together this summer. And they've been hanging out, never fear. They've just never invited me along.
I'm not really sure what to do. Like, I've been as clear as I can that I want to hang out with them, and they've continually ignored me or blown me off or just plain didn't invite me. It leaves a bad taste in my mouth. I try so hard, and all I get back is scraps of their attention...when they remember I'm standing there waiting for them to acknowledge me.
I'm angry, sad, and a little defeated at this point. I mean, you can only kick a person so many times before they start to take the hint. I guess...message received? I don't know. I feel like I should have a good cry and revenge show up at the beach tomorrow. But that makes me look a little desperate for their attention, I think. I've been waiting for an excuse to go to the beach, and here it is, all wrapped up in a little bow and set out in front of me. I can't think of anyone who would go with me though.
So to sum it up I'm sad, mad, and ready to get even. But can you get even when the people who hurt you don't care that they've hurt you? Does that mean our friendship had come to a natural, dwindling end?
I'm going to bed before my brain has the chance to think about how many friends I seem to be losing.
Goodnight.
We were all going to go to the beach sometime this summer, right? Well those plans have finally been put into action. Just...without me. Found out on Facebook. A few minutes ago, actually.
I guess I'm not all that fun to be around? Or according to them I'm not. I thought we were all friends. I thought we were all going to hang out together this summer. And they've been hanging out, never fear. They've just never invited me along.
I'm not really sure what to do. Like, I've been as clear as I can that I want to hang out with them, and they've continually ignored me or blown me off or just plain didn't invite me. It leaves a bad taste in my mouth. I try so hard, and all I get back is scraps of their attention...when they remember I'm standing there waiting for them to acknowledge me.
I'm angry, sad, and a little defeated at this point. I mean, you can only kick a person so many times before they start to take the hint. I guess...message received? I don't know. I feel like I should have a good cry and revenge show up at the beach tomorrow. But that makes me look a little desperate for their attention, I think. I've been waiting for an excuse to go to the beach, and here it is, all wrapped up in a little bow and set out in front of me. I can't think of anyone who would go with me though.
So to sum it up I'm sad, mad, and ready to get even. But can you get even when the people who hurt you don't care that they've hurt you? Does that mean our friendship had come to a natural, dwindling end?
I'm going to bed before my brain has the chance to think about how many friends I seem to be losing.
Goodnight.
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